Haitian Authorities Deny Children Mystery Future

A pile of news was found today with words describing efforts made by Haitian personnel of the Spoil-All-The-Fun Department to stop a group of lucky Haitan children being whisked away by a team of loving, well-meaning strangers.  The group of US missionaries, naming themselves ‘Team Lollipop’, promised to bring fame and fortune to a random selection of Haitian children.  After persuading parents to sign non-photocopied, colour permission slips, Team Lollipop bulldozed their way through the aftermath of the Earthquake in high-powered machines powered by love and good-will diesel. Authorities stopped the group at port when they noticed one of the members’ suitcases contained a sunflower hat and tinsel underpants.

Haitian communications minister Marie Laurence Jocelyn-Lassegue  defended the detainment of the group on the suspicion of childnapping, later adding, “They said I was one ugly mother-f**ker!”  Ms. Jocelyn-Lassegue then laughed like a large Native American man, and detonated herself using a nuclear device.

Haitan Communications Minister: “

One response to “Haitian Authorities Deny Children Mystery Future

  1. “Get ready for a SURPRISE!!”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s